"B" is For Boundaries

Aren’t you glad for white painted lines, yellow painted lines, turn lanes, various road signs, street signs, speed limits, traffic lights and hash marks?  What would happen if there were no boundaries or markers for our highways?  If everyone just “did what was right in their own eyes?” (Judges 21:25)  It would be too dangerous to take a vehicle on the road.  You couldn’t get from point A to point B.  You’d be certain to be in a wreck, and very likely lose your life.  Can you imagine the massive disorder and mayhem?  Wrecks everywhere!

No business could function; life as we know it would cease to exist.  You couldn’t get to work, to the grocery store, send your kids to school, go to church, go to the doctor or dentist, or enjoy a vacation.  Life would be unbearable.  Imagine a society with no policemen.

Aren’t you glad for a society of law and order?  Romans 13:1-5 tells us to submit to the governing authorities, because God has ordained law and order in a society.  God is a God of order.  Boundaries on our highway system are necessary.  Even so, we need boundaries for our personal lives, for our children, our churches, for every part of life.

In the same way, you as a parent need to set good boundaries for your children.  Kids need to know where the limits are, what the rules are.  A child with no boundaries and “total freedom” will feel unloved and massively confused.  He will likely act out his feelings of being unloved by doing something negative that will force the parent to pay attention to him.  His life will become a wreck as he tries to ram his way through life, taking his own way, causing injury to others and disorder everywhere he goes. 

If you truly love your child, you will have the courage to say “no” when necessary.  You will have the courage to say “yes, this is right; do it!”  Just as with road signs and painted lines, guide your child: “This is where you turn right/left; this is where you stop.  This is where you have to yield; don’t go there, go here.  Stay within the lines.  Don’t go too fast; take it slow and be aware.  Don’t lose your head; do what’s right.”

Do you have God’s moral compass to help you set those boundaries?  Make sure you do; get right with God, and give your life to Jesus Christ first of all.  Without it, your family will be in chaos.  Jesus says in John 10:10 NIV “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”  God has spiritual road signs on the highway of life, and we find them as we open our hearts to read God’s Word.  You get to know Him, communicate with Him, receive guidance from Him, and find answers to every situation for your family. 

American culture is a tough course to navigate safely.  Pray with your child to yield to God and receive Jesus as his Lord and Savior for all of life.  Show him what the Word of God says about any given subject or situation.  Don’t just say, “Obey just because I say so.”  Or, “What will Aunt Edna say if you do that?”   That will only teach him to obey, or give in, to please people.  He will also learn to be conditioned to give in to temptation because of the peer pressure of his friends.  Having a firm foundation on the unshakable authority of God will stand him in good stead throughout his life.

Be real and humble with your child; if you make a mistake in parenting, whether it’s losing your temper, meting out discipline that’s too harsh, making a wrong or unfair decision, etc, humble yourself, go to your child, and ask his forgiveness.  It will be a huge example to him of doing what’s right.  Ephesians 6:4 tells fathers not to exasperate their children, but to bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.  God will help you.  Pray for your child; let him hear you pray for him.  It will have a lasting effect on his life.

Thank God for His boundaries!  They are there for our safety, prosperity, and joy.  And whatever you do, don’t move the boundary lines in God’s Word by painting new ones to suit your own willful opinion.  Don’t give in to political correctness.  Stay steady on God’s Word.  We live in a dangerous culture where it seems the boundary lines are being moved every day, and society is becoming a mass of confusion, anger, and fighting, each shouting and jockeying to have their voices heard the loudest above the steady and unchanging voice of God.  When humility to One Final Authority isn’t honored, many “authorities” compete for control.  The result in society will be the same as a highway with no boundaries.

Copyright © 2013 Elaine Beachy