Daddy's Graduation

(Tonight I came across a file of my writings I had tucked away, and decided to post a copy of what I wrote when my dad passed away over twelve years ago.)

~~~

On Saturday, March 29, 2003 at 1:30 in the afternoon, Barb called to say Dad was being taken to the hospital because his lips were purple and he was very weak.  I assumed he'd be given oxygen and sent home with a supply to help his breathing.  He had been feeling ill and tired for some time, but no one knew how sick he really was, and I wonder if he even knew.

The doctor said Dad was very ill and they would keep him for a few days.  He was put into a regular room, but by the next morning, Dave and I received word in church that he'd been moved to the critical care unit. We left the church service immediately and drove to the hospital.  I felt physically cold inside, and it began to dawn on me that he may never come home again, and never see our new home being built next to their back yard.  Sometimes I felt like I was in a robotic be-numbed state as reality happened around me.

For ten days our family lived through the process of watching Daddy slip away to Heaven.  I am grateful for the time we all had with him.  I found myself feeling wounded inside, wondering how I could again pray with faith for anyone who was sick, and I wept because of that too.  The Holy Spirit brought Jesus's words to Peter to my mind:  "I have prayed for you that your faith fail not..."

I distinctly experienced the heart of Jesus when I heard Him speak into my heart that He cries with me.  That was such comfort to me.  Death is God's enemy too, the last enemy to be put under foot, Scripture says.  Jesus was a Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief.  I wondered if perhaps Jesus buried His earthly father, too.  In this life, we can't live forever, but resurrection is on the way, praise to Jesus our Savior!  As long as satan is roaming to and fro throughout the earth seeking whom he may devour, death will be a reality in this life.  We await the consummation of all things in Jesus Christ our conquering King, but until then we live and believe by faith the best way we can with the knowledge we have.  No more is asked of us.

Jesus Cried with Me

We swabbed his mouth and kissed his head,
We children stayed around his bed;
Helped Daddy hug our mama's neck
As Mama kissed her love, and wept.
And Jesus cried with me.

When Daddy couldn't eat or drink
Or even make his eyes to blink,
We stroked his limbs, massaged his feet,
Sang songs to him that were so sweet.
And Jesus cried with me.

In tears we bathed his heated brow
Until he needed it no more.
When breath grew shallow, heartbeat faint,
God was there, and saw His saint.
And Jesus cried with me.

Remembered words, remembered deeds,
When Daddy tended to our needs.
We told him "thanks" for all he'd done,
Then released him to go home.
And Jesus cries with me.

Copyright © 2015 Elaine Beachy